No offense to Norman Rockwell but his artwork usually depicted an ideal and perfect situation. It was a snapshot of a moment in time. Many see that as perfection. Being perfect is an illusion. Some people try so hard to achieve it that it makes them sick, anxious and depressed. I believe in focusing on making progress and not giving in to the perception of perfection.
If you live in the US you have already been inundated with commercials, emails and conversation about ways to give Mom the perfect gift and perfect day for Mother’s Day. I love my mom very much and I’m blessed to have a positive relationship and that we can spend time together.
However, that is not the case for everyone. Some have mothers that were and are very hard on them – maybe they ridiculed, belittled or abused them. Some mothers may have neglected their children. Some mourn the loss of a mother gone too soon. Some mourn that they will never be mothers. Some are mothers who had children who have lost their way or have passed away. Others are desperately trying to have children. There are so many different experiences that are happening to so many people.
What I am trying to get at is that there is no perfect anything. Life happens to people in different ways. For me – Mother’s Day is two things. One – It is a wonderful celebration of the woman who gave me life. Two – it is also a day where I acknowledge that being a mother will never happen for me and my wonderful mother will not get to be a grandmother to my children.
But this is not the end of my world. Anyone going through any of the pain I’ve already mentioned – there are support groups to help you. I attend a support group called Gateway Women. We talk about having a fullfilling life even though we weren’t able to have children and really wanted to.
I know this is hard to believe- but it is also true for father’s day. The “perfect” situation is an illusion. Be kind- realize that the world around you is full of people with a variety of experiences- which may not be the same as yours. Being compassionate and kind – keeps me positive.
Hey – have a great day!! Not a perfect one – a GREAT one!!