Believe in yourself.

It can be a struggle sometimes when you try to do something new. Especially when it’s something that you aren’t sure of but want to do well. Having confidence or believing in yourself plays a large part in your ability to succeed.

You may even have people around you who say you can’t do it – or give up. They – are – not – you. They are doing something called projecting. They are putting their fears and anxiety on you. It is your choice to take it – don’t. Just believe in yourself.

Seek out those people who believe in you. They will give you strength, encouragement and support! In the movie, “The Wiz”, Diana Ross played Dorothy and she sang to her friends – Believe in Yourself, Like I believe in You! You can watch that inspiring video from the movie by clicking here. Believe In Yourself

When you feel you are struggling- tell those people who are your friends and Champions. They will believe in you – until you can believe in Yourself again.

Remember that you are unique – special- and you have talents and skills! Be proud of yourself when you reach a goal whether it’s small or HUGE. And be proud of yourself- even if no one else notices your accomplishment.

Just believe in yourself- like I believe in you.

Being positive isn’t always easy!

If you are someone who follows my blog you may notice that periodically I take a few weeks off. That’s usually when I am having a hard time staying positive. Disappointment, irritations, resentments and things not going my way prevent me from staying positive. That happens when you’re a human being. The important thing is to not stay there in the negative feelings. Choose to turn your attitude around to being positive.

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I have also come to appreciate that you can’t enjoy the view from the top of the mountain unless you have also been in the valley. What I mean by that is that you can only appreciate the positive when you have experienced the feeling of being negative. When I feel negative it is like a feeding frenzy! Everything feels like the worst thing ever. When I feel negative even good things feel bad. But when things turn around in my thinking and I go back to being positive, everything feels good. Like everything is going my way.

Have you ever been having a bad day and and then you stub your toe? And then your coffee spills all over your white shirt? And you’re carrying the groceries into the house and the bags break? And then you forget that you missed an appointment that you made months ago? Everyone has those times! I promise you that they don’t last.

But you have to look for the good! Make a list of all the things that are good in your life! Remember that “this too shall pass”. No bad day lasts forever. It is up to you to make a change in attitude. Some people will say – but you don’t know my situation – an attitude change is not enough. If that’s the case, remember you have choices! Think long and hard about what you choose to do in your life. Make choices that will give you a happy life, joy and positivity. It’s up to you to make that happen.

Even I get down and feel negative. I get it. Life is hard. But this is MY Life – I get to choose. I choose to be Positively Inspired. How about you?

Celebrate milestones!

Today I celebrate my one year anniversary of working at the Hard Rock Rocksino Northfield Park, in the best job I have ever had. This year I turned 50! My husband got a new job! I went on a Pilgrimage to Israel. One of my friends was in a dance competition! And I reached the 1 year anniversary of this blog! These are just a few examples of milestones.

Oxford Dictionary defines milestone as ” a stone set up beside a road to mark the distance in miles to a particular place.” I always thought of a milestone as something Big that needs a gigantic celebration! And sometimes it is! But I like the idea of it being something that is marked on the way to a particular place.

It’s the journey. It’s the events in our lives that build memories. They help me feel good about my progress and my path in life. Frankly, they are the moments that mark steps in my journey of life.

Some people just let life happen to them. They always feel like a victim. Never happy. Always the sad face and a disappointed look on their face. I think if they looked at the milestones in their lives, they would see a cause for joy!

Life has many ups and downs. Some might call them hills and valleys. On that hike through life stop to see that rock at the side of the road that marks your mileage on the journey. That in fact is what your life is – a series of milestones on the way to what you have created- a great life meant to be enjoyed.

Be positive. Positively Inspired!

Trying vs. Doing — a Positive Perspective Shift…

I’ve always thought that when someone says they are going to “try” to do something, there is no commitment in it.  That they aren’t really going to do what they say they will “try” to do.  I have found that to be true in my life.  And a conversation I had with someone recently reminded me of that.  It is definitely a commitment when you say “I am going to do it.”  It is a way of stating that this is now your goal and you are actively going to pursue it.

For example, have you ever invited someone to a party or an event you are hosting and they say, “I’ll try to make it”?  Does that person ever attend your event after saying that?  No. Very rarely does try mean do.

It is good to “try” new things.  But it is not a good thing to “try” someone’s patience.  This is all very trying… okay I digress.

All of this reminds me of the character Yoda’s comment in the movie “The Empire Strikes Back”.  He is talking to a young Luke Skywalker who says that he is trying to do something but it is hard.  Yoda responds “Do. Or Do Not.  There is no try.”

Copyrighted – Lucas Films

Where I am going with this is that when you are ambivalent about a certain course of action it is hard to stay positive.  When you commit to a goal and a course of action, make a plan and then execute that plan – it is easier to stay positive. This doesn’t mean that the path is easy or even clear for you to see where things are going.  But it does give you a light to work towards that is bright and positive.

I am doing what is needed to have a positive life.  I am taking my opportunities to be joyful and active in my own life.  It is a choice to look at life from this point of view.  It’s a positive perspective.  To have this perspective you have to make a shift from Trying to Doing.  Give it a … Try? NO!  DO IT!.

Be Positively Inspired!

 

How to make friends- be one first!

There are many amazing people in my life. Some I have just met recently and others I have known most of my life. Regardless of the length of time we’ve known each other, I find that the quality of our relationships is what keeps me positive.

I love my friends. I try to show them how much they mean to me by keeping in touch and building great experiences together. I definitely have fun with my friends. We laugh! Boy do we laugh! But we have also cried together and have had our share of pity parties. There is nothing like a hug from a friend when I’m down.

I have learned that being a friend is a two-way street. I check on my friends to see how they are doing. I listen. I help them. I invite them to do things. I text. I leave voicemails when I can’t get ahold of them on the phone. We talk things through. I have also learned that in order to have good friends I have to be one first.

I have also learned that being a good friend to myself is important too. If a friendship is toxic or unhealthy for me – I end it. It is the best thing for me and that other person.

Building and keeping positive friendships is what keeps me positive. When you think of your friends- tell them. When you miss your friends – tell them. Tell them how they make you feel, what you appreciate about them, what they mean to you.

To have a friend- be one.

Celebrate every day you get!

On Monday, I will turn 50 years old.  There are so many people who dread celebrating any birthday or dread turning a certain age.  Mostly the reason they feel this way is because they are getting older.  I look forward to my birthday and I usually talk about when it is a month or two in advance.  I feel blest to get another day, month and year with those I love. I get chances to try new things, enjoy new people and experiences and LIVE!  Looking back at my life, there are many reasons why I value that I am going to be 50.  I will share them with you.

I treasure the time I get with my two amazing and loving parents and their relatives. My fantastic brother and his wife are awesome.  And of course my husband and my wonderful friends.

But when I was 19 – I couldn’t see any of that, all I could see was that I was going to flunk out of college and that my goal of perfectionism was falling short.  I did the unthinkable.  I didn’t want to let all of those people down – so I attempted to take my own life – I attempted suicide.  Now I know that it was due to dealing with depression.  Depression is a real and medically treatable illness.  On that day I couldn’t see that there was more to my life than those grades.  Don’t get me wrong, grades are important.  But they are not worth a life.  They weren’t worth mine.

I have come to believe that my life being saved – was a miracle and it was saved for a purpose.  To let others know that nothing is bad enough that you can’t hold on for another 24 hours. PLEASE talk to someone, a friend, a relative, a therapist, a spiritual advisor, a hotline number, just don’t stay alone in your thoughts.  YOU have VALUE.  I HAVE VALUE.

You should know that I was raised to know that I have value – my parents are very loving as were my grandparents.  No one ever told me that I wasn’t.  It was my illness telling me that.  I am so grateful to God that I was not successful.  Because of this experience, I make sure to tell people that they matter to me and that they have value.  But I also tell them that therapy is important, a support system and spiritual life is important.

After having this blog for over a year, I thought I would share part of my journey to being positive.  I have been referred to as “Miss Mary Sunshine” before by people.  Always so positive.  Always so focused on the good.  Looking for a silver lining in everything.  It’s because I have PERSPECTIVE.  I don’t ever want to forget that I am BLEST to have another day on this earth with all the people I love.

Why am I so glad to be turning 50?  Because the alternative sucks.  I love my LIFE.  LIVING it – really LIVING it – takes work, patience, love and a positive attitude.  There are so many people who don’t get to live this long. If my suicide attempt had worked, I would have missed 31 years of AMAZING experiences and people.  I am grateful to still be here and feel that it is my purpose to share that with others.

DON’T MISS OUT on the Miracles!  CELEBRATE every day you get!  Be Inspired.  Positively Inspired.

PS.  Happy Birthday to me!